CONSISTENCY vs DISCIPLINE: You get what you give, period!

I’ve been preaching (and practicing) consistency and discipline for years and I’m here again to remind the collective “US” that you don’t get to complain about results you didn’t get for the work or effort you didn’t put in.  You don’t get to do that.  No!

What sparked this Ted Talk?  A recent interaction with one of my Monat VIPs.  Not a bad one, just a teaching moment for myself and a learning one for them hopefully.  Listen, change doesn’t happen overnight.  Depending on what needs nurturing or repairing, that change takes time and patience a.k.a. consistency & discipline.

I have written on the topic of consistency in the past and my passion should be evident.  Take a read here and while this particular one was during a different time and context, the basic rules of engagement apply.

Diving deeper into the topic this time and I’m going to touch on consistency vs discipline.  How they co-exist.  Better yet, can you do one without the other?  Food for thought but here’s what discipline means to me:

• It’s when we’re consistently doing what needs to be done, even when we don’t want to.

And it’s that part for me, “…even when we don’t want to”.  I’ll explain.

When all the stars are aligned, we feel great.  If life, work, family and relationships are going well then typically we’re flourishing.  We’re smiling on the inside and outside and it shows.  Our “high” is contagious. We’re ready to take on the world, the dream is being chased!  We show up and show out!

On the flip side, we hit an obstacle, injury, didn’t sleep well, hungover, or you just don’t feel like it.  During these times something happens to us on the inside that messes with us mentally.  It will, because we’re human.  We have those moments, and we can and need to feel the feels that come along with them but remember – we are all much stronger than we think.  It’s during those moments of “I don’t want to” or even “I can’t anymore” that we need to push through and come out on the other side.  That’s the discipline.  That’s what builds strength and character.

REMINDER:  I write about my own, lived experiences and POVs.  I come at topics from the mindset of an athlete most of the time because I believe the same tools used in the gym, ring or on the field are transferable to our day to day.

There are many blogs and articles on this subject and a common thread I came across – because I knew I couldn’t be the only one – was that everyone agrees that the two go hand in hand.  I’ve always believed that it’s the discipline that keeps us consistent which ultimately leads to achieving our goals.

Many say that discipline is a learned behaviour.  I agree but in the same breath I’ll say and 110% believe we all CAN and WILL exercise self-discipline if and when we need to.  As humans we’ll always find an excuse to not stick to a plan and procrastinate.  Too tired, too out of shape, no money, too sore or scared about what people will say or think.  I’ll tell you straight up, if it was a party, you’d make the time!

So, I’m a consistent bitch.  Process driven.  Do-what-needs-to-be-done-kinda-gal.  Once I’m in, I’m all in and I won’t disappoint.  I know it and the people around me know it.  That said, it all was tested and tested in a big way recently and the discipline (along with some other traits) kicked in.  In fact, I had to dig deep to find it.

#storytime and just the highlights.

This past June an opportunity presented itself and it ended up being a scam.  Yup, that happened, and it happened to ME!  The person who does all the right things and follows all the right steps before making decisions.  I’m still embarrassed by it and outside of my home and one other person I’ve not told a soul, but I thought perhaps sharing here will help someone in some way.  That saying is true: “if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is” and I’ll add that when you feel even the slightest thing wrong in your gut, run!

I’ve since put on my big girl panties and moved on from beating myself up about a bad decision.  I may identify as “The Machine” but reality is, I’m human and this experience reminded me of that.  I made a (big) mistake and with it came all the moments and motions of feeling stupid, violated, robbed and I may have lost faith in humanity just a little bit more.  Everything seemed as legit as it could be, but it happened fast and apparently, it happens WAY more often than we think.

I’m not sharing this for sympathy but rather to give some real-life highlights vs my usual boxing stories.  The weeks that followed that situation were awful.  Lack of sleep, feeling sorry for myself and dealing with threats from said “company” daily.  I didn’t have the luxury to just curl up in bed every day – which is what I really wanted to do.  I had to dig deep and find my “IT” every day and guess what, I’m still here, on the other side.

While this was happening, I was at my lowest.  Lower than I’d been in years and I believe that “low” was the obstacle vs the actual scam.  Getting out of my own head, trusting that I could deal with it little bits at a time and the first step was talking to a lawyer/judge and then reporting it.  I still lost out if you know what I mean but while it was hard and some days I didn’t want to, I got back on track to the things that matter in my life and the things I CAN control.  That was the discipline, and I did that consistently.

I didn’t share my usual fitness experience, but my hope is that showing and sharing something that happens daily will either help someone else be more vigilant OR remind another that they’re human and shit happens.

Remember, it is worth it to start your own business, follow through on that new idea, start a fitness program or even just stand up for yourself.  You just have to be STRONG enough to do what needs to be done ESPECIALLY on the days you don’t want to!

Stay strong and stay beautiful my people.

• I want to give a shout out to my husband Ashley. I’m blessed and better for having you in my life.  You support every venture and activity I jump into, and you stand by me through thick and thin without question or hesitation.  When I’m all in, you’re all in.  Thank you for being by my side through this one and reminding me who the fuck I was during a really shitty time.  ~ Love, Shireen