2025 POV | GIVE YOURSELF THE GRACE YOU GIVE SO FREELY TO OTHERS

It’s already September 2025 and the last blog I posted was in 2024!  Take a read here but, ironically I had to put everything in that piece into practice this year.  If you’ve read it, you’ll know that my word of the year is GRACE, and I had to remind myself that I deserve the same GRACE that I give so freely to those around me.

I’ve been asked multiple times this year, “Shireen, why aren’t you writing” and my blanket statement is just that life is life’ing and that’s that.  Truth is, I couldn’t create words, stories or lessons to share.  Did I try?  Yes and with all of me I did but without success or rather, without having something even half decent to publish for you all and, compromising authenticity is not in the cards for me!

To run it back a little, my goal for August was to run/walk 100km and I had to be consistent to achieve this.   I added the walk option as a backup if I needed it due to an ongoing knee injury that I’ve been working on strengthening and rehabilitating.  I gave my knee some GRACE and I’m happy to report that I clocked 115km for the month with only around 20% done in walks.  Thanks to strength training but more so, CONSISTENCY!  I have continued my runs but scaled back a bit to make room for the other goals this month 😊.

Here’s the thing, something started to shift on those runs about a week or two into August.  The mix of fresh air (the goal was keeping all runs outdoors), the feeling of accomplishment or just the appreciation for being able to run without pain and move my body daily.  Whatever it was, that feeling of “wanting to” came back and I realized that is what was missing!  Or, maybe it was running regularly again.

I can’t not give a back story so here’s the shortest version for you.

October 2024 I suffered a concussion during what was supposed to be a light sparring session.  Diagnosed a light concussion but when I was told no contact for 8 weeks, my heart sunk.  My confidence in the ring, the gym, and the confidence I thought others had in me withered away over those 8 weeks.  Physically I felt fine but mentally and emotionally I felt like I was just getting by.   I was too proud to admit anything to anyone, including myself.   I’m physically tough and mentally strong by nature and was forced to be from a very young age so my survival instincts kicked in right away.  I’m also the eldest daughter so you know how we do…suck it up and push on through mentality but, there’s an expiration date to that.

2025 started with a big enough distraction which, in hindsight, was what made me realize that I needed to give myself more GRACE!  I was coaching our 2025 FIGHT TO END CANCER team.  Coaching 12 boxers to get ready for their first bout and aside from providing them with the tools to succeed, there was the other stuff….building confidence by encouragement, talks during and after sessions and even on days off.  I was in this position of mentor and motivator while I struggled with my own confidence as a boxer BUT on the other hand, as a coach, I was thriving, enjoying seeing their growth and in turn (without knowing it at the time), healing my inner boxer.

Small things switched.  I started enjoying my own workouts again.  The anxiety I’d feel pulling up to the gym was minimal until it quickly disappeared.  Dancing to my own beat and doing it for me vs trying to fit in or earn my way back.  I started trusting my own skills regardless of whether I received feedback or coaching.  I didn’t rely on validation and honed in on the fact that all the years of training could not be erased by one unfortunate and unexpected event – which was not my fault.  If anything, boxing has taught me resilience and simply put – refusing to stay down.

So, without going deeper (I’ll save that for my memoir in the future) here are a few things I’ve learnt on this healing journey:

PRACTICE WHAT YOU PREACH

I gave myself grace and really leaned into it.  In hindsight, I believe that I had to go through it to grow as a boxer and a coach.  When I stopped blaming myself for something that wasn’t my fault and stopped trying to fix it, I felt like I could breathe freely again.  That, along with some simple tools like meditation and journaling, really paved the way for me.

WHERE FOCUS GOES, ENERGY FLOWS

There is so much noise around us, but I made a concerted effort this year to focus on what matters.  I put my energy into myself and healing first and foremost, my family and coaching (for the first half of the year at least) and I thrived!  If you or anything didn’t fit into those three main boxes – I got to it/you when I did.

YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOU THINK

Everything happens for a reason.  Cliché?  Perhaps, BUT the lesson almost always reveals itself when I’m challenged .  It always takes me longer because I go through it vs talk it through with someone close.  I have to go through the motions and while the hard days are sometimes brutal, I always feel stronger on flip side.

SET AND MAINTAIN BOUNDARIES

This one is bigger than we care to admit!  In fact, it’s very necessary.  Setting boundaries are essential for our own peace of mind and mental wellbeing.  Remember, not everyone will like it and whether they get it or not, it requires some inner strength plus a little thick skin to stick to it.  It’s a liberating self-care tactic for sure!

YOU ARE NOT WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU

Self-explanatory but, while I worked through all the things I had to, being around people who looked up to me and looked to me for mentorship was the turning point for me.  Helping them was what helped me heal.  There’s a lot we cannot control in life, but we can control how we show up and that includes showing up for others as well as showing up for ourselves.

YES, YOU CAN

You always can.  This quote I love goes, “if it was a party, you’d make a plan or you’d make the time”.  We jump at the easy or fun things but we’re quick to say “I can’t” when things seem hard or require a little extra effort.  You always CAN – just depends how much you want it.

I was going to title this “I’M BACK” but frankly, I never left.  Your girl just needed to do what she always preaches:

“REST & RECOVERY ARE PART OF THE PROCESS”

….and that rest and recovery can take as long as it needs to.  Healing from any type of trauma is not a linear process.  It affects the mind and the body, and we all go through it or work through it differently.

Strength is beautiful and it’s good to feel like I’m walking in my own power again.