FEBRUARY: THE MONTH OF (SELF)LOVE

Do you or have you ever felt guilty when doing something nice for yourself or something that will benefit you before it does anyone else?  If you answer yes, you’re not alone but we shouldn’t feel this way.  Really and truly, we should not!  Self-love is not selfish and that self-love should be a way of life.  February is just the reminder!

Life is meant to be lived and for most of our lives we are living it for others by putting everything and everyone else’s needs ahead of our own.  I believe that we can still love and care for others while making sure we’re on the top of that list!  In fact, filling our cups first allows us to pour more into the people and things that we care about.  We’ve all heard the quote (and most have likely lived it to) “you can’t pour from an empty cup”.

This is where that self-love and self-care comes in.  It doesn’t have to be elaborate, grand gestures all the time and doesn’t have to cost anything most of the time.  Doing small things consistently will help sustain a filled cup and you’ll keep pouring into what you should be nurturing first and foremost – YOU!  Everything else will follow!

My January started in the most unexpected and most heartwarming way.  Going to Cape Town was a last-minute decision and without going into too much detail, it started out with an ah-ha moment that I could have entertained, but I chose not to take it on and  I believe that in doing so, I opened myself for the “amazing-ness” that was to come.  I put myself, my energy and my well-being first to protect my own sanity and make the most of a trip I deserved!

I’m still riding the high of spending so much needed time with family but the cherry on top of this trip was re-uniting with my childhood girlfriends.  Forty years of friendship and it was the first time we were all in Cape Town at the same time in over 20 years!  I savoured every moment and it aligned with my word of the year – GRATITUDE – so perfectly.  My heart is always full when I leave Cape Town and I’m ALWAYS so in awe of the strong women in my circle but this year I feel like I got the whole meal with a whole lot of extra gravy.

My girls inspired me and reminded me of the importance of these connections.  We caught up, laughed and reminisced and I kept saying “thank god there was no social media back then”!  We’re all in the same phase in our lives so sharing our stories and struggles with all the changes was so healing but one thing stood out for me – well maybe 2 ha-ha.  We’re a damn loud bunch and taking up space is a non-negotiable!  BUT, more importantly, we have paved the way for our daughters, nieces and one day granddaughters by being so authentic, real and most of all showing, living and practicing self-love.

So yes, the physical trip was a big gesture but the time we spent together along with the talks and laughs AND making some future plans (stay tuned) were and still are absolutely priceless!

I can’t possibly fill a blog post with all the ways we show and live self-love, but I’ve put together a list of actions we can do consistently (for February and beyond) to keep our cups filled so we can pour into the things that matter most:

1. Practice daily gratitude: Practicing gratitude has physical and mental benefits which include, but are not limited to, reduced stress & anxiety, improved sleep, better relationships and improved physical health like lower blood pressure.
   • “When gratitude is expressed and/or received, the brain releases our natural medicine, dopamine and serotonin, two crucial neurotransmitters responsible for our emotions. Dopamine and serotonin contribute to feelings of pleasure, happiness, and overall well-being”. – Dr Teresa Marsh

2. Spend time alone daily: Something as simple as drinking your coffee alone, in silence to taking yourself on a lunch date! A walk outside, in nature, if possible, does wonders for the soul. Read a chapter or journal and even if you have to schedule 30 minutes just for yourself, you’re your priority. 

3. Move your body: Movement is medicine, period. Daily movement is essential.  Whether a 30 minute stroll, a power walk, run or lifting weights, your body will thank you in the moment and in the long run. 

4. Fuel your body: Food is fuel and remember, we consume with our eyes so make sure what you eat is pleasant to look at and preparing what goes into your body is therapeutic in itself – BONUS! 

5. Hydrate: Drink water like its liquid gold friends and increase that intake during hotter temperatures and if you’re working out regularly. Benefits include both physical and cognitive functions as well as aiding in digestion.  Proper hydration promotes healthy skin and eliminates that foggy brain that we may feel from time to time. 

6. Make sleep a priority: I still struggle with this but even when I can’t sleep, I at least practice proper sleep hygiene most of the time. What does it mean?  Start winding down around the same time every night.  Limit or cut out bedtime scrolling by replacing with a book, journaling or even meditation.  This one is hard and I don’t always get it but it’s doable. 

7. Choose people who choose you: Self-explanatory but let me tell you, once you stop chasing relationships, people and situations that don’t benefit you OR those that simply make you go “Hmmmm”, you’re free! More importantly you’ll be able to focus on those that matter, starting with yourself. 

8. Be your most authentic self: We were put on this earth to LIVE and that means being you and true to you. For years I was told I was too loud, too passionate, too much and when I tried to adjust, I got asked “what’s wrong, you’re so quiet”.  Point is, you will never please everyone so just do you!  The world will adjust.

These are just a few things to help you get started but feel free to add to it and fill your cup with more of the little things and do them consistently.  It will lead to great rewards in the long run, and you may inspire another along the way just by the way you show up for yourself.

February is referred to as the month of love so why not start with yourself?

#february #love #selflove